


Rebirth

by stareyednight



Series: Brooklyn Girls [4]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: 1940s, Alternate Universe - Always a Different Sex, Captain America: The First Avenger, F/F, Female Bucky Barnes, Female Friendship, Female Steve Rogers, Post-Serum Steve Rogers, Pre-Serum Steve Rogers, Project Rebirth, Rebecca 'Becky' Barnes, Stephanie Rogers - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-16
Updated: 2016-12-16
Packaged: 2018-09-08 22:35:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,348
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8866081
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stareyednight/pseuds/stareyednight
Summary: Camp Lehigh, Project Rebirth and the start of a friendship

  “She’s going to murder me. Wanted me to stay home, didn’t want me getting into any more trouble and I’m pretty sure she’d consider this a big one.”





	

The first day she was at Camp Lehigh, Agent Carter came knocking on her door.

Steph was unpacking her tiny suitcase, the contents spread all over the bed as she refolded everything into the small chest of drawers provided. “Agent Carter,” she said, surprised. “Come in, please. Should I salute you, ma’am?”

Agent Carter smiled as she entered, looking as immaculate as she did each time Steph saw her. “Well, as technically I’m with the SSR and not the US Army, I won’t insist. But, I shan’t tell that to the men if you won’t.”

“Yes ma’am.” Steph finished with her clothing and tucked the suitcase under the bed. “What can I do for you, Agent Carter?”

“Well, Private Rogers, I actually came to see if you would like to have lunch. I must admit that it’s refreshing to have another woman here and I thought that since we’re the only two, save the nurses, you might agree?”

Steph grinned. “I would absolutely. It’s just myself and Private Bradley in this wing, so I wasn’t sure if I’d be eating alone.” She shuffled the photos and books on her bed into a neat pile and smoothed down her skirt before following Agent Carter out and down the hall.

“Yes, with yourself and Private Bradley being the…” she paused delicately “exceptions to the existing pool of applicants, it seems as though you will be assessed separately, though all the data will still go to Colonel Phillips and, of course, Dr Erskine.” She looked over at Steph and her lips tightened minutely.

“Can’t have the lady and the coloured man showing everyone up,” Steph snapped, but quietly.

“Quite,” Agent Carter agreed dryly as they took their trays and found an empty table.

 

Over the next few days Steph pushed herself as far as she could. She and Private Bradley ran the obstacle course over and over, after everyone else of course, and she attempted to not look like she was choking on her own breath as she scrambled up the ropes and tried not to get tangled in the barbed wire they crawled under. Once or twice the ‘regular’ soldiers left pieces hanging precariously so that they fell as she and Private Bradley navigated their way through, but Steph spat out the mud and kept going.

She was nursing a sore shoulder and fighting with her hair one evening when Peggy stopped by just in time to hear her hiss as she tried to brush the back.

“Here, let me.” Peggy nudged the door closed and took the brush out of Steph’s unresisting fingers. “If you’d like we can cut it short like the men.”

“No!” Steph raised her hand to cover her head and Peggy laughed as she winced. “I just need to braid it down tighter or something.” She closed her eyes as Peggy sat on the bed behind her and began gently untangling the knots at the back. “Thanks, Peg. Sometimes when I was sick for a stretch Becky used to brush it for me, but I think getting caught in barbed wire is a new level.” Steph tried to push away the reminder of Becky softly and carefully brushing out her hair, the way she used to soak up the feeling of Becky’s hands touching her head and stroking through the smoothed strands.

“This is your best friend, the one who joined the WACs?”

Steph swallowed and hoped her voice would be steady when she opened her mouth. “Yeah, she’s overseas now. Got posted with a unit in Europe.”

“That’s unusual,” Peggy commented, laying some of the untangled hair over Steph’s shoulder.

“Yeah, she got picked out at Basic because she turned out to be a heck of a sharpshooter. They gave her extra training then shipped her out to join a unit that needed a good sniper.”

“My, she must be very good.”

Steph shrugged, struggling to keep her emotions level even though Peggy couldn’t see her face. “I guess so. I sort of wish she wasn’t though, so she wouldn’t have been sent so far away. I was hoping she’d end up in a typing pool in California,” she tried to joke.

Peggy’s hands and the brush stilled. “Is this her here?” Steph turned to look at the photos Peggy was inspecting on her wall.

“Yeah, that’s her.” It was half a strip from a photo booth, the two of them crammed onto the seat together, leaning their heads in and smiling broadly. Steph remembered that out of frame they were holding hands and her gaze lovingly traced the curve of Becky’s chin and the spark in her eyes. Becky had taken the other half of the strip, where she’d pressed a kiss to Steph’s temple in the last photo.

“She’s a Sergeant?” Peggy said, looking at the other photo on her wall. It was Becky in her uniform, with her sisters and Steph, taken just before she shipped out. It was carefully placed between magazine photos of Errol Flynn, Humphrey Bogart and other movie stars so as to not call attention to itself too much, but Peggy wasn’t just anyone.

“Got promoted in basic, just before she left for Europe.”

Peggy turned back from the photo and looked at Steph. “She must be exceptionally good, then. They don’t normally give WACs guns at all.” She picked the brush up and started back on Steph’s hair.

“From how Becky tells it, the brass showed up with someone from a specialist department. They gave everyone a shot, literally, and said that Beck was good enough that it didn’t matter she was a woman. They held her back longer at Basic and gave her more training, then when she got her orders it was out to the front.”

“Well, I’m sure she’ll be pleased to hear you got into the Army, then. After, what was it Dr Erskine said, five tries?”

Steph forced a chuckle through her tight throat. “She’s going to murder me. Wanted me to stay home, didn’t want me getting into any more trouble and I’m pretty sure she’d consider this a big one.”

“Why didn’t you, then? Stay home, that is,” Peggy asked, still brushing through the tangles in Steph’s hair.

“Why didn’t you?” Steph replied simply. She shrugged with one shoulder. “There’s a war going on and it’s our duty to do what we can. It doesn’t matter that I’m a woman, it doesn’t matter that I get sick sometimes - what matters is we can’t let bullies win.”

“Well, you’ve got my vote. If even half the men in this program believed what you do, then we’d have less trouble making a decision. It’s exhausting to wade through so much testosterone every day.” Peggy sighed. “But, we need to make absolutely sure that the right candidate is selected. Otherwise, the consequences could be disastrous.”

“They’ll make the right decision, Peg. Even if it isn’t me, I know Dr Erskine will. This is more than just about making someone bigger and stronger, it’s about the embodiment of all the troops fighting out there, keeping us all safe.”

“And you’re not worried or scared to possibly be joining them, fighting on the front lines?”

“Well, yes, of course, but there are plenty of other people just the same as me giving everything they have, so why shouldn’t I? I’ve taken enough hits for standing up to someone in an alley, why should I stop because the guys dishing them out got bigger?”

Peggy had finished detangling Steph’s hair and was idly smoothing the brush along. “If I didn’t know you, I’d be sure you couldn’t be real. So much patriotism in one person.”

Steph winced. “It’s not patriotism, it’s not about America, or even the war. It’s about keeping other people safe and standing up for what’s right in the face of what’s wrong.” She turned to look at Peggy. “I’ve been told my whole life to sit down, shut up, stop causing so much trouble, just because I think people should be treated the same as each other. I’m Irish, for god’s sake. I just want a chance to actually make a difference and maybe with the serum I can.”

Peggy patted her on the shoulder and stood up to leave. “I have every faith that you could, too. From everything Dr Erskine has told me those qualities are essential to the success of the program and I just hope that when the time comes, the right decision is made.”

 

Morning exercise was really the only time Steph and Private Bradley (“call me Isaiah, we’re outcasts together”) interacted with the other soldiers. Peggy was putting everyone through their paces and Steph struggled to keep up with the pushups and jumping jacks, the hoarse sound of her breathing mostly drowning out the sneers of the ‘regular’ soldiers.

All of a sudden she heard Colonel Phillips yell “Grenade” and saw the small sphere hit the ground. Around them everyone scattered, hitting the deck and ducking behind cars. Steph barely spared a look around and dove on it, trying to use as much of her small body to cover it as possible. She held her erratic breath, waiting the horrible seconds until... nothing happened. She lifted her head, looking up at Peggy who was staring down at her. She could see Dr Erskine and Colonel Phillips watching from over near one of the trucks.

She squinted through the dust. “Was that a test?”

 

They brought her to the infirmary for a few more tests. Hodge was there, too, and they both had blood drawn, measurements taken and a photo. Steph stood there in her slip, feeling awkward and cold as she weighed up if hitting Hodge with a tray would get her expelled from the program. The second time he tried to look down her slip, her fingers started inching towards it, but they were interrupted when Dr Erskine entered, followed by Peggy and a grumpy looking Colonel Phillips.

“Private Hodge, you may return to your barracks, thank you.” Dr Erskine inclined his head, polite but dismissive. Once Hodge had left, Erskine turned to Steph. “Well, Private Rogers, are you ready?”

Steph swallowed and pulled herself up straight. “Yessir, I am.”

“Then I believe we shall start the preparations for the procedure to take place tomorrow. Agent Carter will escort you to the site in the morning and Colonel Phillips, you will take care of the rest of the soldiers, see they are reassigned as per their files?”

Colonel Phillips humphed and walked off, leaving Peggy to wink at her slyly before following him. Dr Erskine inclined his head and shrugged, before turning his gaze back to her.

“You understand what this means, Stephanie? You still wish to go ahead?”

“Yessir, I do. And I do, more than anything.”

He gave her a smile. “Then we shall proceed.”

 

The next day, after… everything, Steph sat on her bed at HQ and stared at the wall. Her suitcase was open on the bed beside her and the photo strip of her and Becky was clutched in her fingers. Her long fingers on her new larger hand. That was attached to her larger body. She could barely recognise herself in the mirror and was currently wrapped in a dressing gown of Peggy’s as all her things were too small now. She’d been lucky they had the foresight to put her in trousers and a much larger shirt before the procedure started so that she had stumbled out of the machine with most of her dignity.

There was a knock on the door and she put the photo back down on the pile in her suitcase. She cracked the door open and was relieved to see it was just Peggy, carrying a department store bag.

Peggy bustled in, setting the bag down and starting to draw things out of it. “How are you feeling?”

“Tall.” Peggy smiled at her and Steph shrugged. “Hungry. I feel awful about Dr Erskine and angry at Hydra. Also, my chest hurts.”

“Well, we can start with hungry, I brought you some sandwiches. Dr Erskine knew that an enhanced metabolism would come with this, so he anticipated that you’d need to eat much more frequently.” She handed Steph a paper bag and Steph fell on them as Peggy continued. “I’ve brought you some new clothes and a new uniform. I guessed a little based on your new measurements and the shoes might go either way, but at least you won’t be barefoot. As for the last of your problems, I think a new brassier will make all the difference.”

Steph looked down at her chest, which had grown with the rest of her. “Probably. I’ve never had to really think about it, they were always small like the rest of me.”

Peggy handed her the new bras and her lips twitched. “Well, not anymore. It’s not the worst thing to come out of this and you never know, your sweetheart might appreciate it.” She gave Steph a wicked smirk and Steph flushed to the roots of her hair.

“You know I don’t have one,” she managed and Peggy hummed.

“Yes, of course, dear. Now try these on so I can take away what doesn’t fit.”

Her face still hot, Steph put down her third sandwich and ducked behind the screen in the corner of her room. As she fumbled out of her too small underthings, her mind raced and she tried to remember if she’d said anything too incriminating and somehow spilled the beans to Peggy. She’d restricted herself to just those two photos of Becky and remembered to also have plenty of handsome stars on her wall. She’d only brought one letter with her and it was folded up between pages of her journal for her to take out and trace her fingers over at night.

The new bra fit and she was distracted from her thoughts as she boggled at the way she now filled the cups. Gently, she prodded the soft curve at the top and startled when Peggy called out to her.

“Everything fit?”

“So far.”

Pulling on a dress Peggy had draped over the top of the screen, she smoothed it over her new curves. Bigger breasts, bigger hips, longer legs, broader shoulders. These were the outer changes the serum had wrought and as she took a deep breath she felt some of the inner changes as well. She inhaled again for the novelty of filling her lungs past where she expected her breath to catch and watched as her new breasts rose to meet the buttons of her dress. This was absolutely going to take some getting used to.

Stepping out around the screen Steph awkwardly spread her hands. “I feel like… I don’t know, like a totally different person.”

Peggy stepped up to her, now a few inches shorter, and regarded her steadily. “You may look different but you’re still you inside, and that’s the most important thing. Your heart was what made you perfect for the serum and nothing can ever change it. The rest, well, that’s just going to take some getting used to.”

Steph couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled out of her. Take some getting used to, like it was a haircut, not thirty pounds and ten inches. She covered her mouth as she kept laughing and Peggy narrowed her eyes as it took on a tinge of hysteria.

“Stephanie, are you sure you’re all right?”

Steph took a deep breath and tried to calm herself. “Yeah, Peggy. Just tired, I think.”

Peggy still looked a bit suspicious, but she nodded. “Alright. Finish that food and get some sleep. They want you for some tests tomorrow.”

Steph nodded, picking up her earlier abandoned sandwich. “Alright, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow. Have a good night, Peg.”

“You too.”

Peggy let herself out and Steph finished the rest of the sandwiches, blinking when she realised she’d eaten five. In the bag of things Peggy had brought, she discovered a nightgown and a new uniform. She hung the uniform up and changed into the nightgown, folding her new things carefully. As she moved it all off the bed she put the photo strip aside and, once she was tucked in, held it up so that she could see Becky’s face in the lamplight. She touched her fingers to her sweetheart’s smile lightly. She hoped Becky was safe, wherever she was. Letters had been sporadic and always censored, so she didn’t have much to go on other than alive, cold, and in Europe.

She looked at her own face in the photo, her old face, and the way Becky’s arm pressed up against hers and remembered how her hand fit so perfectly in Becky’s. Would it fit now? And the way that Becky used to curve around her, she wouldn’t be able to now. She looked down the bed at her longer, bigger body. Would Becky still even like the way she looked? She hadn’t fallen in love with a towering hulk who kept bumping into tables, what if she didn’t like the changes? What if she’d liked having a sweetheart that fit so neatly under her arm, the perfect height to rest her cheek on and lean around for a kiss. 

Steph wouldn’t want to take it back, not the way her body finally felt free of aches and her breath came easy and she had a chance of making a difference in the war effort, but the thought of Becky not wanting her anymore made her heart hurt. She took a deep breath in again, marvelling at the ease of it, and let it go. She would just have to worry about that later. Right now she had to focus on what they wanted out of her and her new body and she’d figure out how to break it to Becky another time.

 

The next day found her sitting in a lab at SSR HQ, being tested and having blood drawn until she felt like a pincushion. She knew Peggy was right about the secret to Dr Erskine’s formula being locked in her body, but it wasn’t a pleasant experience. Steph couldn’t shake a guilty feeling that she had been part of Dr Erskine’s death and she wanted to do what she could to make sure his gift to her didn’t go unused, but she sincerely hoped that they were done with the needles for a while.

Colonel Phillips brought that hope crashing to a halt. “I asked for an army of super soldiers and all I got was you,” he snapped and Steph felt her spine stiffen even as her heart crumpled. She’d had so much of being told she wasn’t able to do things that she’d nearly perfected the mask, but it still hurt. All she wanted to do was help people and even after everything she’d gone through she was still being told she wasn’t good enough. “The only place you’re going is a lab.”

“But, sir-”

He was already striding away, barking at Howard Stark to start packing up as people darted out of his way. As she watched him, the other man who had arrived with him finally stepped up.

“With all due respect to the Colonel, I think he’s missing the point. Morale, and enlistment, has been high since your picture appeared in the paper.” He snapped his fingers and his aide handed him a newspaper. He unfolded it to show Steph and Peggy the front page - a photo of Steph holding the taxi door like a shield during her confrontation with the Hydra agent. “Man or woman, you don’t take a symbol like that and hide it away in a lab.” He looked at her, straight in the eyes as they were now of a height. “Private Rogers, do you want to serve your country on the most important battlefield in the war?”

Steph looked back. “That’s all I’ve ever wanted, sir,” she said, trying to convey her absolute sincerity.

“Then congratulations, you just got promoted.”


End file.
